Palavras sem sentido ou I should have kissed you when we were running away

I don't care, and I smile for free. In the end I still miss you. I go blind. I'm so tired and I know I can be beautiful even like that. But it's hard, it is so hard, and not being understanding seems like loosing you and I've been being strong and resolute, I am dying, I will die, and all of this will seem so cleary a mess, and I will think Oh, how have I fallen in the temptation of doing this, Oh, how have I trusted it would work, Oh, why don't I trust myself and everything. Then I will die empty and without a word, I will die alone. I simply can't be sure you won't walk away; I want to see it with my own eyes. Oh, my god, it's being hard.